Tag Archives: friends

Quests & Queers

In Vancouver, LGBTQIA2+ or an ally, and looking for somewhere to go to play games in a safe and fun encouraging environment? Have I got the place for you!

Once a month at both the Storm Crow Tavern on Commercial and Storm Crow Alehouse on Broadway, I host Quests & Queers! Q&Q is a gaymer (meant as an all inclusive word) night for people who might want to just be around other queer people, who might want to meet more people outside of the typical events, or feel a bit awks about going out on other nights.

Come have some drinks (I love rolling for shots), eat some food (I happen to know the chic pea fries are great), play some board games, meet or bring friends! I’m there to make you feel welcome and as included as you wish to be. If you have
a group I can help you learn some games, if you are flying solo I can set you up with some players.

 

The next few dates for the both venues have been set!

Alehouse – Tuesdays

  • January 23
  • February 20
  • March 20
  • April 24

Tavern – Mondays

  • February 5
  • March 5
  • April 9

Sign up to get my bi-weekly Newsletter (scroll down on the website menu) that will send reminders about the next event regardless where it is (along with the other nifty stuff I am doing like new blog posts or roleplaying games), or you can follow me on Twitter, Instagram, or Facebook.

Cant wait to see you there!

Happy Gayming

A very bad day: follow up

Okay. I am sad. But I have a lot of great things and people in my life. A short list of bright patches on this yucky day:

  • Friends who are there for you at 3 in the morning and buy you breakfast the next day.
  • Friends who let you bother them at work and cry on their shoulder.
  • Friends who offer to carry your groceries for you cause your hand is a mess.
  • Friends you didn’t know were your friends until you spend time with them.
  • Friends who get it, and get you.
  • Friends who invite you for much needed trips.
  • Friends who text you in seconds flat after seeing your whiny blog post.

Basically I’m #blessed to have so many kickass friends in this world. You’re the reason why I’m here. Love you.

Bragging Moment

I am privileged that I was asked for an interview on the podcast Table Top Babble by James Introcaso.

The podcast aires on the Dont Split The Podcast Network and has had guests Like Mike Mearles, the D&D Adventurers League Admins, Wolfgang Bauer of Kobold Press.

I have been a fan of this podcast since it started 44 weeks ago. I love the fact that I am going from being a fanboy of thing RPG related to becoming a peer among people like Introcaso who create and influence the games and the community that play them.

Thanks James, I look forward to the next one.

You can hear the episode here.

Speed Gaming

When speed dating you have to ‘sell yourself’ in a small window of time, 2-5 min, enough to get the person to want to hang out with you again. Gaming is very similar when introducing your character. While you don’t have to sell yourself to get the GM to want to play with you again you do have a limited amount of time to get who your character is across to the rest of the table

When you play in a convention or a store game you are stuck to a limited amount of time, often two to four hours, to play through the module. On top of that you usually don’t know who the characters, or players, are until they sit down and introduce themselves. Most role playing games rely on tropes to make certain things obvious: a fighter is going to be a heavy hitter, a cleric can heal you, a wizard will do area damage from the back, and a rogue will sneak and steal. After that there is a personality, usually dwindled down to a line or two, “you speak very slowly cause you think everyone is less intelligent than you,” “you like shiny things and have to make a grab for it.” Simply sharing these things can increase the inclusion of the other players into your character and allow for better submersion into the world you are about to imagine.

If you are running a home game, my next blog will deal with how to make the character sharing more immersive and how to create a group or team out of strangers.

 

I as the GM (Game Master), have a difficult time in proving who it is I am and why I am qualified to run a game for you. Often, the fact that I am there is enough. Most Conventions and gaming stores vet their GMs. That said, it is arrogant of me or any other GM to simply assume that because I am there is enough for you to want to be at my table.

I can’t go off simply going through my entire history that through me to that table. As a GM who has been running games for nearly ten years it would simply take too much time and eat into the actual game and still not help. Instead, I have to pick and choose relevant information that will help the players feel at ease that their imagination is safe at my table and that I will guide them through a fun story. If it is a Convention I will likely say how long I have been at that convention, at a store I am able to tell people that I have some convention experience and offer other bits of info like who I have ran they may know, or other games I am able to run.

Simply said the speed part is a skill that you get as you go. The first few times you game in public you will have to just pick and choose. As you do more gaming in more venues you will learn what works to share and what does not. Make a list of a couple things (literally a couple) that are relevant to the situation and give it a try. If you think it needs tweaking you can always do that for next game.

Remember to have fun and keep the dice rolling

6 Friends That Every Twenty-Something Definitely Has

1. The Party Friend

Everyone likes the party friend. They’re always ready to hang out and will dismiss sleep, work and responsibility in order to get down with you. They’re the one screaming at you to do shots, introducing you to hot people, and generally trying to bust you out of your shell.  This friend is great because they’ll get you out of your pajamas, out of the house, and maybe even get you to have a great time. Negatives are that you’ve carried them home on your shoulders more times than you would like to count, and they tend to disappear on particularly messy nights.

2. The Older, Wiser One

This friend has seen some shit. They’re there to watch you try, fail, and fall flat on your face, but you better believe they will coach you through your pain better than anyone else you know. They’ll step right in when the moment is right, and offer you sage advice that would never occur to your young little brain. Most of their stories start with: “Something like that happened to me once…”

3. The Long Distance Bestie

This friend will be your best friend whether they’re 3 or 3 000 kilometres away. When you actually get around to messaging one another, it usually includes: [I misssssss you ♥♥♥] or similar iterations, but you know you’re both very busy and important people and both of your hearts are in it. When this person comes to visit, everything else SHUTS DOWN and they become your life. This friend is not great to drunk text at midnight when you are in different time zones, but is handy to have around when you need a couch to crash on in varying cities!

4. The Younger One

It’s very important to keep a younger friend around to:

  • keep you hip to the newest slang
  • show you cool memes
  • remind you that you are an adult and you can’t drink 9 Hey Y’alls and feel okay the next day
  • make you feel very wise and intelligent (for you are their Older, Wiser Friend)

5. The Decades of Friendship Best Pal

Most people only get one True Blue friend like this one. If you’re lucky, you might have two, or even a handful. This friend knows every. embarrassing. story. that could ever be used against you, along with a vast arsenal of photographs that could most certainly dissuade any suitor from ever engaging with you, were it placed in the wrong hands. This person is your best friend. They’ll be there for you no matter what. You’ve probably had massive fights in the past, but you know that making it through stuff like that has only made your friendship stronger and better. This one will be in your life forever, whether you like it or not, so you should probably get used to it.

6. The One That’s Probably Too Cool for You

This friend hangs out with you even though they’re probably too cool for you. You get to go to cool events with them and pretend like you’re on their level. You’re not, and this is obvious, but it’s pretty nice of them to have invited you in the first place.  This friend is worldly, well-dressed, and has an impressive vocabulary. You may strive to be like this person, but you probably never will. The Cool Friend is very good for your personal self-image, but they probably just like spending time with you, cause maybe you’re cooler than you think.

 

 

“He is just a Friend”

This story was shared by one of my barista friend. I rewrote it in my way. 

 

I was working on that day. During my break, I received his message saying that he was going to drop by later. My heart started to race up. I told my colleagues that instead of serving customers, I would prefer to stay in kitchen. I did not know how to treat him as an ordinary customer.

I forced myself to focus on cleaning dishes or on preparing foods but I could not focus. My eyes were waiting for his smile. My ears were waiting for his voices. I was sure that each of my cell in my body was waiting for his arrival.

As soon as I saw him entered the cafe, I started to blush.

Without saying anything, he just nodded to me and sat at the bar straightly.

My colleague turned to me. I could see a lot of question marks in their eyes.

“He is my friend. He is here waiting for me to have dinner later.” I explained.

My colleagues grinned at me. Obviously, this answer did not satisfy them. I knew that they would definitely ask me more about this guy next time. The life in a cafe was too peaceful. We were eager for gossips, stories, dramas and more.

But what can I tell them? He truly is a friend. A “friend”. A friend I should not fall in love with.

 

When we were having dinner, he asked me: “how did you introduce me to your colleague?”

“A friend. ” I said. “What else can I say?”

“To be honest, I did not know how to introduce you. I did know what we are. Our relationship is special for me.” He said.

Yes, I understand. We are friends but we had sex. We are friends with benefits but we involved feelings. We are not in a relationship but we sometimes cook together, have dinner together, go grocery shopping together or watch movie together.

We blurred the line. We erased the label. We ignored the abnormality.

“Just say friend.” I replied. “I appreciated the one who invented the word friend. It could cover a lot. If you don’t want to explain, you could just say that s/he is a friend.”

Then we fell in silence.

 

 

Surprisingly, our “friendship” still lasts till now. We do not know if this is right or wrong and we do not want to think about where we are going in the future. Perhaps, we would end up with not talking anymore with each other like other couples, but I will always remember the day he visited me at the cafe. I will always remember that we were once happy together.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Single’s Awareness Day

I’ve had this countdown on the front page of my blog for the past few weeks, counting down to Valentine’s Day, or as I sometimes call it, “Single’s awareness day”. Despite some bitterness over this title, I usually really enjoy valentine’s day. I like dressing up for it, looking cute, knowing that today more than others people are thinking about their significant other and maybe doing something special for them. This Valentine’s day however, was my first one in three years without a valentine.

I can remember my last three valentine’s exactly. Last year I was on Mt. Washington in Nanaimo with my then boyfriend, Elliott. He bought me snowboarding lessons for Valentine’s day and we had an overall pretty great time hanging out with him and his friends.

The year before I had just started seeing Nate, a guy I had classes with at Langara, and we were at my place hanging out and also doing edibles for the first time. Hella romantic.

The year prior was my first ever year with a Valentine- I was at my first boyfriend Keenan’s house and he made us dinner and then chocolate fondue. Super cheesy, and a very new type of Valentine’s day for me. Some shit went down that night that almost ended our relationship, but we worked it out and were together for almost a year, my longest relationship to date.

All three of my past relationships have started roughly around the same time. New year, new person to date. This year being the exception, I was a little mopey over the fact, although not as much as I would normally be considering I have a lot more going on right now in my life and it’s working as a pretty good distraction for the time being. Never the less, I made an angsty post on my Tumblr account.

Super mature.

I ended up making plans for the day with one of my best friends, Desiree. We hadn’t hung out in a little while and she didn’t have plans. So I headed over there around 4pm. She lives a few minutes away from Commercial Drive, one of my favourite neighbourhoods, and I listened to music as I turned right at the JJ Bean and headed up the hill to her house. On the front porch I knocked on the door as well as texted her, since she shares the house with several other people. Peering through the window, I saw something on the floor. The following ensued:

She had made me dinner and essentially covered the whole place in rose petals. Never in my life have I been so seduced, and here it is, plain as day, by my best friend. We ended up doing facemasks and watching this terrible 90s romcom called “The Wedding Date” which is a movie about a woman who hires a male escort to come with her to her sister’s wedding to make her ex-fiancee jealous. 10% on rotten tomatoes, but it was worth every second to me.

Desiree had seen my Tumblr post and decided to make the day go above and beyond for me. Just another example of how friends are the best thing in the world, and sometimes guys aren’t worth shit if you’ve got someone who will cook you steak and buy you piles of Nutella-To-Go for you to snack on. I love my friends and it definitely makes this whole “not in a relationship” thing worth it sometimes.